During training, the Peace Corps talks about the cycle of emotions that volunteers tend to experience throughout their service. They even gave us a handy diagram as a reference. Around this time is the adjustment phase, which tends to accompany feelings of anxiety and stress. Homesickness tends to intensify and the challenges of living abroad become more apparent.These past few months have been the most challenging thus far. After completing my work at the orphanage, I continued to attend more volunteer trainings. The stress of living out of my pack for many months was wearing on me. I went back to site with the hope of feeling more relaxed, because I would finally be in one place. When I got to site I woke each day and tried my hardest to focus on my work and mission as a volunteer, but I still didn’t feel right. I felt scared and confused. I wanted with all my heart to be a volunteer in my site. Yet, I felt out of balance. I needed to see my family and be around people who would provide me with lots of rejuvenating energy.
Thus, I made the decision to return home to reconnect with loved ones. When I was home, I did lots of yoga, ate healthy, spent lots of time with family, and focused on getting stronger. I think my decision to return home will make my Peace Corps service more productive. Because I myself feel stronger, I believe I can be a greater source of peace for my community.I have learned that I need to be strong within myself, before I can efficiently support and serve others. Thanks to my wonderful friends and family I am feeling stronger! My journey these past few months have also filled me with humility. I am human, which means I am vulnerable. I am not invincible, and I need to protect myself.
Transitioning back to Peace Corps life has been challenging, but each day is becoming easier. Everyday has been filled with a blessing of some sort. I started a girls club at the youth center, which includes dance, music, art, and hopefully some cooking! I am also teaching English and playing lots of UNO, soccer, and Frisbee.
Today I finalized my plans for a mini-remodel in my house. I am going to put Moroccan tile into my courtyard. It has been fun decorating my space!It feels good to be settling back into Peace Corps life, and I don’t have to leave site until the end of the month! Hamdullah! (Thanks be to God in Arabic)
Lots of Love and Merry Christmas from Morocco!